3 Comments

Stacey, I so appreciated your words today, as well as those of Emily Oster in today's NYT OpEd: https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/28/opinion/coronavirus-schools-reopening.html?campaign_id=39&emc=edit_ty_20200728&instance_id=20707&nl=opinion-today&regi_id=52195613&segment_id=34546&te=1&user_id=9005ddf2b06eaff8deed575d082f0322

Some of us (ahem) are perfectionists, as the author points out. We want the reopening of every aspect of our lives to be perfect--partly because the handling of the pandemic has been so NOT perfect--but it won't be. We need to think about, talk about, and prepare for, every eventuality!

Expand full comment

Thank you, Stacey, for your heartfelt and thoughtful post. Sometimes there are no good options - it is like the choice of Arjuna in the Bagavad Gita. Caught between the warring armies of family and boyhood friends, Arjuna must choose between them - he cannot stay neutral. Any choice he makes will cost him dearly, emotionally, yet choose he must. And in choosing, he must make a new reality with his choice.

I am a retired teacher who spent many years in public schools where a school building was the safest place for a child or young adult. I also taught in private schools where it was imperative that children of privilege learned that they were not better or smarter than others. Schools really do matter, and now many parents are realizing just how much they do.

I spent two agonizing hours on 9/11 with 125 9th and 10th graders in our brand new Upper School program, on that fateful day, watching the Twin Towers come down. Then, after conferring with the small staff of our fledgling school, I announced that we would return to an abbreviated class schedule for the remainder of the day. “We will not let terrorists dictate to us or control our lives”, was the unified message we sent. The other message - nothing will ever be the same again. This is the dawn of a new age - get ready for it.

And I told them the story of my childhood, listening to the Berlin airlift, the Cuban missile crisis, the Conelrad alerts, missile drills and of being in grade school when JFK was assassinated. Then Vietnam, Chicago, and the worst of all, losing Martin and Bobby. I had to remind them of the lesson we tried to learn, all more poignant today, that Dr. King taught us - “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

Every generation has its challenges. Adults must be there to guide the younger ones, and advise the older ones, as to how to meet them. Just as in Arjuna’s case, there is no easy answer, and there is no right or wrong answer. There is only the failure to meet the challenge. I truly appreciate what you are doing, Stacey, to help your daughters to meet this challenge by looking into your own heart. And a good heart it seems to be.

Expand full comment
author

Thank you so much for your words and for sharing these stories. I did not know Arjuna's story but it sure does feel relevant these days. "Every generation has its challenges." for sure and it does appear this will be our children's. Stay healthy and thanks for sharing!

Expand full comment